so, Quenton has been working wicked long hours, and I'm ok with it just because it's more $$$ for baby and for our needs. However, I'm starting to feel a little overwhelmed with the little things that I'm trying to accomplish here. I haven't been sleeping very well (typical in pregnancy, I know), so I often feel pretty groggy throughout the day. I've had some really productive days, though, and I felt so good at the end of those days. But, then the next day I see that I again have some dishes to do, more vacuuming, more laundry, organizing, and making lists of things I'd like to buy or do before baby comes, and I feel like it's all never ending. Maybe that's supposed to be normal in pregnancy too, but it makes it a lot harder knowing that there are things that I need to improve upon SPIRITUALLY as well before baby arrives. Where to begin?? Our home teacher talked about reading the Book of Mormon and how wonderful it is, and I was reminded of how infrequent I've been studying. How could I do that??? I need to be a better example for my family, and now's not the time to be slothful.
After talking to Q about testimonies and how now is NOT the time to be a fence-sitter, I wanted more than anything to improve those habits that will help our children know where we stand, and hopefully know where they stand. I like to think that even if we weren't expecting our first baby, that we would still pick up on the seriousness of our own spiritual standing and of those around us.
So, in a nutshell, I feel overwhelmed with the temporal things -cleaning, cooking, organizing- mostly because I don't want to have it all overpower me after the baby comes, and I feel an urgency to improve on my family's spiritual well-being. To repeat myself, where to begin?? I suppose with the temporal things, just doing what I can is sufficient. With the spiritual matters, I need to begin at the beginning. Just the simple steps that we all know of - reading, praying, keeping my testimony strong - is a good place to start. I suddenly feel the urge to preach repentance like in the good ol' mission days, but I'll refrain for now. :)
So, having said all that, I want to start being more domestic and bake more (it's amazing how much you can do when you don't have school and work getting in your way!) and to become the kind of mother mine was to me. I have a long list, and only 20 days to get things in order, but as long as I take the first step, I think everything will be ok. :)
5 comments:
It sounds like you know exactly what you need to do! You are wise in knowing that all the housework isn't what is most important! I found it really hard to keep up with the spiritual things as well. I worry about it constantly and about the example I am showing to Hailey. I thought I wasn't doing anything I was supposed to... but then Hailey's first word was 'amen'. I learned then that I am not perfect but I must be doing something right!
There are things you HAVE to do and things you WANT to do in every day. Break it down. Make sure that you do the HAVE TO'S first. You are not going to be ready when baby comes. No one ever is. You'll grow with your child. You are a great person and will be an even better mother.
It's great that you are working on priorities right now because it definitely doesn't get easier when babies come into the picture... more laundry, more dishes, more mess. Decide before she arrives what you want, and then it'll be easier to fit it in somewhere.
My dearest Tanya...have you ever heard, "for everything there is a season"? If there are any times in a woman's life when she is allowed to relax, it is the last weeks of pregnancy and the first weeks after the baby. You need to breathe, it's going to be OK. Actually, it's going to be awesome! and crazy and exhausting and messy, and it's ok! right now as I type, conference is on tv, the baby is whining, and I am trying to put Ariel's leg back on. The counter is covered in peaches and groceries, my bed is not made and no, I didn't shower yet today. But we re happy, we are healthy, and if you ask a lot of grandmas they would say they wished they had worried less about the house and just played with their kids. At 7:15 when the kiddos are in bed, the place will be back in order, ready for another day. We all need to read our scriptures more, having fhe with a baby is weird for a few years, but you just keep going to church and being the awesome lady you are and try not to compare yourself to others, or to some insane standard no one acheives, and you will be happy. hugs!!!
you don't have to have everything the second baby is born. if something is not done it will get done. i am so excited for you!
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