loss and healing

i had an appointment yesterday to talk to a nurse with the Early Pregnancy and Childhood Loss Clinic. No, everything is fine with this baby. :) Since our miscarriage in July I've been thinking about talking to someone, especially with a new baby on the way. I won't talk about everything she mentioned, but there were a few pointers that I'd like to share (at least things that affected me).
I know not everyone goes through a loss like this, but if you do, know that it's OK to feel whatever you want to feel. Some people are completely devastated, others see it as something that happens and that they move on from. It was really difficult for me to have people (doctors and family/friends) tell me that "it's just your body's way of getting rid of what wasn't going to make it" or "you'll be fine. it wasn't that big of a deal. you can try again". I know they weren't trying to be insensitive, but THEY WERE. So, that's obviously something I have to work through. Another thing is that there are tons of support groups (at least in our area) available.
Quenton and I were talking last night, and we've decided on what we want to do to remember the babies we lost (because to us--and a lot of people-- they were babies). Dealing with our losses will help me prepare for this baby that's coming.
Another thing I learned is that, although it isn't official in Canada yet, there's an Early Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness day on October 15th every year. We've decided to join in on whatever is going on here in Edmonton to remember all the babies that were lost.
Last, but certainly not least, there's faith. I know that through our first loss, our faith definitly wavered. It's sometimes so difficult to understand how something like that can happen, even when there's a child running around and keeping you busy. I learned how important is was for me to really turn to Heavenly Father for the comfort I needed. One thing we know for sure, is that Heavenly Father trusts us enough to take care of His children. That helps me know that we can endure anything.
This has definitly been a year of change and growth for me and my family. No matter what, I KNOW that Heavenly Father is in control, and He has a plan for me. I am more grateful for my family now more than ever. How blessed we are to have such a loving Father who watches over us, and to have family and friends to turn to. :)