a-ha moments......

I've been doing a lot of reminiscing lately about different events in my life, and although there are some things I would change, most I wouldn't. :) It did help me decide, however, that I not only need to be thinking about the future, but to prepare as well. Now, I'm not necessarily one for just living in the moment, but whenever I look at Hazel, I think that there are so many things that I want to do for her to help her live the best life.

We had the missionaries over last night, and we were talking about contacting and sharing the Gospel with friends and neighbours. I remember as a missionary how easy I believed it was to share something that I loved so much. I've discovered, however, it's a little more daunting than I remembered! Anyway, Quenton and I have decided that we need to make more of an effort, especially so we can show our kids how important missionary work is. I want them to love the Gospel as much as I do, and I really feel like this year will be a great year for us and missionary work :)

I've also dealt with post-partum depression, and feel that being around friends and performing service will help me to overcome some of the obstacles that come with PPD. I know there's a lot more that I can be doing (whether it's meds, councelling or whatever), but I want to see what I can do about preventing some symptoms before they happen. I know some girls who have had PPD with their pregnancies as well, so I'll probably turn to them for advice. :)

I need to say, too, how much I love my family. Not just my own little family, but my siblings and parents. I have felt for a long time that I'm different from my family members, and that I don't have as much in common with them as I used to, but all of that aside, I love them. There have been some things that have happened recently that have made me really think about what's important, and family is right up there. I haven't always felt that I could forgive past wrongs, but I read a talk President Faust gave in May 2007 called "The Healing Power of Forgiveness" that has really struck a chord with me. I think sometimes it's harder to forgive and move on than I would like, but if the goal in this life is to be as happy as we can, we need to do the hard stuff. Family is worth it. Eternity is worth it. Our happiness depends on it.

a little help :)

so I was talking to a good friend the other day, and we were discussing children. Going from 1 to more than 1 sometimes seems like a daunting task, so K sent me a link to a blog we've both followed. After I read it, I felt like I could do this :) I highly recommend this for anyone expecting their second, third, or even fourth baby. :)

Thanks, friend! :)

daydreaming is ok :)

I remember when I was growing up, I was SUCH a dreamer. :) I've told Quenton this tons, but I would watch movies (especially Disney movies) and want the hero and heroine to get together in the end. I was a huge romantic, and would slowly piece together the kind of "prince" I wanted to sweep me off my feet. 

I always knew that I'd be married to a wonderful man, (I just didn't know it would take as long as it did!). Quenton has been one of the best things that's happened to me. :) I often think about how much Heavenly Father loves me, because he blessed me with the most amazing man. 

He is more patient with me than I deserve, he treats me like a queen, and he has the best heart. I love watching him with Hazel, and I can't wait to see him with this new little one. :) He never complains about things, especially the things that I forget to do around the house! And I love how he helps our with EVERYTHING. He's not afraid to change diapers, or do dishes, or cook. How did I get so lucky? I have no idea. 

This Valentine's Day, I was hoping to do something special for him. With this pregnancy, I'm having to take each day as it comes, so we'll see what I can come up with :) Bottom line: I LOVE this man :) I know that after all those years of dreaming and hoping for someone who would make me happier than I could have imagined, I got something even better :)

this week so far...

ok, so I'm sure I'm not the only mom who wonders if she's doing right by her child.

"Is this the proper way to discipline?" or "Am I being too much of a push over or too mean?"

These are some of the questions I've had, especially lately. Don't get me wrong, Hazel is such a great kid, and I love her to pieces, but I think she's picking up on my concerns over whether I'll be in over my head with 2 kids. I don't want to be "that" mom who says "no" to everything, but I feel that way when I'm tired or not feeling 100%. I know that there are family members and probably close friends who definitly have a different way of disciplining, so it's sometimes hard to "commiserate" when our views don't mesh.
I did, however, talk to a good friend today who gave me some good tips on not getting Hazel frustrated and how to discipline with love. I'm feeling like it's not so impossible now, and today is definitly a better day. :)

On another note, I am feeling FULL. It's funny how much you can forget about being pregnant, like how the baby will actually be GROWING :) This little one moves just as much as Hazel ever did, but hasn't had the hiccups yet (that I know of!). I keep telling Quenton that I forget how big this baby is getting until I get a kick here, or I read onling approximately how much "he" weighs. I sometimes look at Hazel and think, " wow, you were once the size of an avocado, or a grapefruit!". Now she's gabbing away, climbing up on couches, and growing up way too fast :)

baby baby,,,..

so just a quick update on our little peanut:

He (I say "he" so I don't have to say "it") is moving around TONS. :) I don't mind it at all!
He's definitly in a different position than Hazel was, because I've been having some serious stomach acid issues. I've tried some different tips from people, but so far all that's helped has been a prescription for Ranitidine. Sometimes that doesn't even work all that well, though. But, it's only temporary, right?
I think, according to my doctor's response, that he's growning just like he should be, so I'm hoping for around the same weight that Hazel was (hmmm, is that wishful thinking?)
I started Weight Watchers back in November, and haven't gained any weight, so that's a good thing (right?). :) It's been hard to overeat when my stomach has been so unpredictable, but learning to eat smaller portions, even while pregnant, has been a good habit to get into. I'm hoping it stays after the baby comes. That's my plan, anyway.
I'm already feeling uncomfortable, which makes it interesting when I'm trying to chase Hazel around or even play on the floor with her! I'm sure she prefers when daddy is home, since he has more energy and can do more with her. :)
I've had moments of being a little nervous about having 2 kids around, but I'll just take it a day at a time. For now, I'll just deal with my inconsistent stomach issues, and remember that this pregnancy really isn't that bad :)
Only 105 days to go...... are we ready?

I think so :)

ch-ch-ch-changes :)

i haven't written about Christmas yet, but I really wanted to document the changes that will be happening in the White household this year :)

So, as we were coming home from our holidays, Quenton and I talked about the changes we wanted to happen in our family. It actually got both of us really excited, since we feel that this is already going to be a  good year :)

So, one of the first things we talked about was our health. We don't eat a lot of junkfood (unless we're travelling), but we do like icecream. So, we're limiting ourselves to some sort of a treat once a week. It'll help us to change our desserts and start better habits. Going along with that, we're both going to continue with Weight Watchers. No, Quenton doesn't really need to be doing it, but having both of us on it will continue good eating habits, and let's face it, it's easier for me to do it if he's on board. :) I'm technically not supposed to do it while I'm pregnant, but I have been, just so it's not a huge change once I have this baby. He's lost about 10 lbs and I've lost around 7lbs. :) I got Quenton a workout bench for his weights at Christmas, so he's going to work out at least 3 times a week. (yes, that makes me happy!) Yay for a healthier lifestyle!!!

We also want to make sure we have the Elders over at least once a month, and invite friends over for dinner once a month too. I think coming from a place where we had NO space to entertain people, it's a bit of an adjustment to see that we can start doing that more now. Plus, we don't get out with friends that often, and I think it'll be good for us. sidenote: did anyone else notice a difference in associating with friends after you 

got married? We did. I just found it comfortable just hanging out with my hubby, so friends kind of went to the wayside.... glad we're going to remedy that!

We are going to be more diligent about no tv on Sundays and focus on watching Church and family movies. Having kids around definitly help to adjust your perspective! We also talked about FHE. It was hard to have something planned out when it was just him and I, but I'm excited to plan activities for Hazel and help her to understand that this is what we do one night a week. I've written a schedule on the calendar, and I'm really excited to get this going!

I would like to get into more crafts. It'll be good for me, and hopefully I'll get back into painting. Last year I didn't really take a lot of time for myself, and I think that by doing this I'll be a lot happier and more prepared for this little one to come :) plus, now that I'm on pinterest, the possibilities are ENDLESS!!! 

Our main goal for the year is to be happy. That sometimes takes effort, but it'll make our family time more enjoyable and I know that our kids will benefit and remember all these moments. :)

breathe, just breathe......

ok, so first let me say that I'm sure some of you will read this and think it's no big deal, or maybe I need to toughen up. Yup, this was a stressful day.
First, Quenton has been working nights this week which means he normally leaves for work around noon-ish and doesn't get home until after 11pm. Normally that's not a big deal, but today was super busy. I'm the Activity Leader in Primary and we meet every first and third Thursday (tonight), and we were doing a painting craft. Anyway, I had to do some last minute running around this morning to get the rest of what I needed for tonight, plus getting a couple things for lunch (we invited a friend who is getting married tomorrow to come over). While I was out, I got a message from the lady who helps out at the activities telling me that she couldn't make it tonight. Normally, not a big deal, but with Quenton working at night, I needed to bring Hazel with me. (stress level rising) **side note, yes, I probably could have found someone to watch Hazel for the 2 hours, but 1) I didn't figure this all out until it was almost too late, and 2) I don't really know anyone available and who I trust. **
Oh yeah, and since I had no helper tonight, I realized when I got home that I would also have no paint brushes. (stress level rising even more....) SO, I needed to feed Hazel an hour early, load the van with all the supplies, go to the dollarstore, pick up the brushes, drive to the Church, bring Hazel and all the supplies in, get set up, and do a PAINTING craft with my toddler playing sometimes and wanting my attention sometimes (with a sad look on her face). THEN, at one point, because I needed to go and look for someone and was going to be quick, I left Hazel in the room with the girls and when I returned she was crying uncontrollably because she thought I had left her and she couldn't find me. :( :( :(  I held myself together, but promised myself that I'd give her some extra cuddle time when we got home.
After carrying all my belongings and loading up the van (again), we finally got home (where I also had to deal with 2 dogs that hadn't eaten and 1 is a big fat whiner). I put her in her pjs, and gave her some milk. She seemed just fine, and went to bed without a fuss, and I think she even enjoyed the extra cuddles.
Yes, I shed some tears; some of frustration, and some of sadness at having Hazel upset that I left her. I know, I know, things will be different when there's another little one around, and I know that Hazel will have to get used to not getting all the attention. I don't think she's spoiled at all, and I know that there are billions of women who have to multitask like this all the time and don't complain. I just needed to get it out, and now I'm better. I know I have a lot to be thankful for. Especially for difficult days that remind me of what's important and how to improve myself for the future.
yup. now I feel better.